IF I...........

If i didn't quit my job 2 years ago I wonder how life would be,

would it be much easier and would it be stress free.

would I get along with my boss or would I just suck it up,

and would I even be in this situation waiting for some luck.

If I never had knee surgery how would life be,

would I be banging down low instead of shooting the three.

Could I wake up every morning and not feel any pain,

and play every damn minute in my basketball games.

If I were to move to another city how would life be,

would I be lonely because all I have is me.

would the transition be tough or would it be easy,

and would the people I leave behind even miss me.

If I never met you how would life be,

i'm not even gonna think about this i'm just gonna let it be

cuz i'm glad your real friend

hopefully you got my back, cuz i got yours till the end.


BTW- i am not emotional, i just like to share my thoughts.. NAW MEAN!!!

OF COURSE I LOVE YALL, I LOVE ALL YALL!

YES!  I LOVE WOMEN.. All types of women.  I worship women.  I love the way yall walk, talk, smell, argue, bitch, nag, complain...i just love everything about yall even though I don't understand yall.  I know I'm not the only guy who feels this way.  Do yall want a thug in your life?  What is wrong with someone being to nice?  Don't you want to be put on a pedestal?  With all these questions that pop up in my mind and how crazy you WOMEN are I still love all YOU!  I go away to try and forget about yall and what is the first thing that pops up in my mind YOU!  It didn't help that when I was in Tahoe all i saw was Women.  Left and right, behind me and in front of me.  It was like there was a HOT woman's convention or something.  

If i treated yall wrong I'm sorry.  Some of you don't believe the word "Sorry" when it comes out my mouth but I'm sincere and I really mean it.  So I say SORRY to all the woman in my life.  All my friends that are women, all my family that are women and all the women I dated I say sorry for being an Ass to you.  I will even say sorry to the women  I will meet in the future because no one is perfect!  I am human.  I also promise to treat yall like how I treat my mom's and thats with respect.  If I don't I allow you to slap me!  hahah

***

I dedicate all these songs to ALL YOU WOMEN...  Enjoy! PRESS PLAY THEN WATCH THE SLIDESHOW.  ahhaha

FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL or (ADD NAME HERE)

I've been having a hard time sleeping these past couple of days.  Maybe its because I was so used to working the graveyard shift.  And since I am currently not working I'm not used to sleeping at the regular time again.  I did fall in and out of sleep around 10pm but ended up waking up around 2am.  So to keep me busy I watched FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL.  I must say this movie was really good.  I thought it was gonna be a straight up Comedy but damn it got hella serious.  Well I don't want to get into the movie because I don't want to ruin it for the people who haven't watched it yet.

After watching the movie I asked myself why do people say these type of things? " You should get away and think about stuff" or "you need to get away to get your mind of her/him."  YEAH I'm always down for a little get away but I am not the type to runaway from issues.  And to tell you the truth I am not all for the Forgetting about someone part.  Especially if that person made an impact in your life.  You feel me?  Yeah there are people that hurt me in the past and present but I never want to forget them.  Those people helped build the person I am today.  I've learned a lot about myself  from all the relationships I've been in whether or not its a friendship type of relationship or a BF/GF type relationship.  Therefore I would never want to forget those people.   

BTW:  I WILL NEVER FORGET MY "SARAH MARSHALL" regardless on how many people tell me too.

IF IT ISN'T LOVE....WHY DO I FEEL THIS WAY?

THIS WAS SUPPOSE TO BE POSTED LAST WEEK..BUT I WASN'T READY TO POST IT.  THIS IS THE PERSONAL ONE!

"if it isn't love, why do i feel this way?  Why does she stay on my mind?"  As said by NEW EDITION in there song "If It isn't love" and that is exactly the way I feel right now.  

Have you ever fallen for someone that you know you can never get?  Lets take it a notch higher.. Have you ever fallen for someone that you can never get and that person is your friend?  If you have then you know how much it sucks.  Some of you may know her but the ones that don't she is really a great person which is one reason why I fell for her once again.  You maybe asking yourself why did he say "once again?"  Well around 2 years ago I was blessed to meet this young lady.  At that time I was still on my " I don't give a f*&K" steeze.  I wasn't gonna trip over a chick because prior to that I was in a long relationship that ended sour because I was played 3 times.  We don't even have to get in this subject right now.  Lets just say my ex made me not care about chicks or even myself.  So anyways lets get back on track......So I met this lady and we dated for a little while.  I loved being around this girl.  She opened my eyes to what it was like dating someone with child.  I became more of a patient person because of her.  She's a real chick, she doesn't sugarcoat anything.  She helped me become a better person.  So to keep a long story short I messed up a few times.  Nothing like dating another chick at the same time as i was dating her.  But i wasn't real with her or real with myself.  So we stopped dating and actually didn't speak to each other for almost a year.  When we stopped dating or even talking to each other I was determined to get her back into my life because she made it that better.  So this year she forgave me and accepted me back as a friend.  But the more i hung out with her the more my feelings started to get stronger and stronger.  Yes I know she is my friend but how are you suppose to stop these feelings for someone that you really adore.  To that point that i feel that she is the missing puzzle piece to complete my puzzle.  Knowing that she reads this blog this could make me look really stupid.  But Love makes you do stupid sh*t like this.  You can call me stupid for even falling for her because I know I won't get her back in my life like that.  But like I said earlier I can't stop these feelings from happening.  I can truly say that I have only been in love with 2 chicks.  My ex and i lost that love along long time ago and now this girl who pretty much got me when I first seen her at Poleng lounge.   You know i could say some sh*t like, "dam i need to get back to the real Roland and not give a rats ass"  but that ain't the real me.  This is the real me.  This is how real as it gets.  Will I ever get what I want?  Probably not.  Regardless she will always be that person who I can always call a friend.  Yeah Yeah.  I'm a big softy.  Everybody has a soft side.

THE REPOST

Since I deleted my old blog and started this new one I was asked by 2 of my readers to post the poem I wrote called THE ONE again.  One person said he wanted to use the poem..LOL!  And I'm not sure why the other person wanted it up again.  Well here it is again for your reading pleasure.  I also added 2 bars to this poem.

THE ONE

The one is the first thing that pops up in your mind when you wake up,

The one is the person you fight with to kiss and make up.

The one is there for you when your out of luck,

The one is worth more then a million bucks.

The one is what you miss when that one is not around,

The one can act serious and act like a clown.

The one is the shit at everything they do,

The one is babe, hun and boo.

The one is the one that you never let go,

The one makes you a better person as you grow.

The one is versatile in the game,

The one will put you in your place and put you to shame.

The one makes you complete before you become ONE,

The one is the moon while you are the sun.

The one will dislike you at times,

The one is number ONE not 2, 3, 4 or five.

The one is the person you would do anything for to a certain degree,

The one is the person you will try to always make happy.

The one is your "righty" while you are "the lefty,"

The one at times can act a lil bitchy.

The one will think that you are just sprung,

The one will make you frustrated and make you stick out your tongue. (at them)

The one might make you want to throw in the towel and quit,

The one will know then that you are persistent.

The one makes you think outside the box,

The one will make you crazy and drink a bottle of scotch.

The one makes you do things you don't normally do,

The one brings out the words I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU.